Journal Excerpt - June 6, 2010

I just feel so empty as of late, like there is absolutely nothing inside of me.  No muse for the purpose of creation, no love to give away, nothing.  So empty.  My smile hides it, of course.  I don't even know if there ever was a twinkle in my eye to begin with.  If there was, it's long gone.  I have no goals; I've destroyed any means I had to achieve them.  No great love, no friends.  It's just...me.  An empty shell.  I know anyone reading this that knows me would be quick to think I am crazy.  I go around saying I'm a photographer but I sure as hell don't feel like one.  I party like a rockstar and fuck like one, but no one witnesses the dark times spent alone in my room.  I wouldn't dare let them.